A Year's Time, To My Dear Friend

Dear KB,

    Sitting here reflecting on my day, year, thinking about you. It has been a whole year since I've got to laugh with you, cry with you, heck even be annoyed with you. Miss you so much!
    So much has changed within this year and I just want you to know all that you've missed. At the same time I also know you've been with me along the way though too. I studied abroad, saw the sites  in Spain and Portugal, started my third year at Cal Poly, got a few new jobs, and even moved into my own house now! Wish I could share all my stories with you about leading the freshmen around at my job this summer. You would just love it! I wish you were here to crack up about all the times I thought I met "the one" in Spain or even her in SLO. But I just cannot bring myself to dwell, even on a sad day like today.
    You were and are my friend for a reason, you brought out the positive parts of this world. I'm sure you would tell me "you got this" if you heard me being such a complainer. So today unlike most I have decided that I was going to embrace your spirit. I have "selfied" uncontrollably, laughed obnoxiously, wore bright pink (somewhat uncomfortably), and even found myself dancing goofily.
    Thank you friend for teaching me over and over again what it means to have a crazy beautiful life.

Until we meet again,

Lauren

P.S. Listening to our favorite song over and over today so though it was appropriate to quote... "I just hope some people see there's nothing that I'm trying to be..." -Ke$ha

"In tow"

    Tonight, with my family and friends I celebrated both my birthday and leaving on my adventure to Spain in 7 days. As I sit down after being surrounded by such great people I can't help but shed a few little tears... but happy tears.
    This past summer has been one filled with many changes and obstacles for several people that I love dearly. It has had its ups and downs but as the warm days wind down in the small town of Hilmar for me I am noticing how perfectly things are falling into place. I can finally say it is just my time to take a step of my bubble.
    I leave knowning I have incredible family and friends that will pray endlessly for my safety, continue to love me dearly and even more importantly support along this adventure. Tonight I was reminded of how much love can be poured out for one person. It is a fabulous feeling.
    I am just so, so amazed and thankful.
    About a month ago as many of you may have known, my bestfriend Karly was sent to her heavenly home. A month ago I was bitter, confused, and in a guilty state of mind from what I thought was a loss. During the past few days with the help of her presence, I am reassured that I can embark on this adventure with Karly still right by my side. I have not forgoten nor have I loved her any less I am just ready to accept her presence in a different format.
    To Spain I go with my bestfriend still in tow!

A Letter to my dear friend KB

My dearest KB, Karly Barker chick, slippy-slidey, best friend. Today as we meet together to celebrate your beautiful life I hope to remind those gathered of the energetic spirit you brought to my life as a friend.

         Let’s start back at age five, I remember kindergarten together and you introduced yourself as Kaly Baker. Little did I know Kaly Baker would become my best friend.

         Before we knew it we were having play dates together and it came time that we start losing teeth. Just like it was yesterday I remember the day you lost your first tooth. I was so anxious to know what it felt like and you made sure your mom and I understood it was the worst thing ever. As it always was there was screaming involved. There was also the day I chocked on a bead in the back seat of the car and you were prepared to give me CPR at age six. We never had a dull moment together.

         Then there were the days of dancing together, whether it was in dance class or just for fun at home. You loved choreographing dances with me, especially if NYSNC or The Backstreet Boys were involved. We took our love of dance to another level with cheerleading together in high school. Right before we would dance at halftime you would always make sure we said a little prayer for safety and guidance. When you were nervous I somehow promised you it would all be fine and you always reminded me to smile and “shine” out there. I could not have done it without you.

         During the past five years I got to know my Karly on a whole other level. You became a counselor, a crying partner, bus buddy, and sister in Christ. We shared the struggles of finding a date to school dances, picking out what to wear for the first day of school, keeping our stress to a minimum when it came time for college applications, and making sure we found each other back at small group once a week to regroup with Norma. One of my favorite memories of high school is the nights we had sleepovers together as senior year was coming to an end. You suggested we start “sleepover Thursdays” so we could cherish the few weeks we had left before the “real world”. We were and are inseparable.

         In the recent months as we conquered being apart during our first year of college I never felt I missed a beat. Your weekly “love you” texts and facetime dates made me feel close despite the distance. As the loving person you are you even made time to come visit me and understand what the dorm life was all about. This summer we picked back up like nothing had ever changed. I am so, so, thankful we even spent one last houseboat trip together too.

         Not only are you a fabulous friend but a true role model. Every minute you spent on this Earth was displaying your love for the Lord. From you I have learned to be selfless, welcoming, patient, forgiving, and happy! I remember one rough day during school I had tripped over a hidden root while walking to class with you and you made sure you picked me up despite our embarrassed giggles. You dusted me off and reminded me “you had my back”. It was the little glimpses of love that showed those around you your faith.

         I am thankful for what you taught me in our short time together. You are incredible woman that will continue to improve the lives of people around you. Let’s us never forget the silly Karly Barker we all love. As you would always tell me when I was leaving anywhere, “see you soon love”. 

         I’d now like to finish with a poem:

A million times we've needed you,

    A million times we've cried.

    If love alone could've saved you,

    You never would have died.

    In life we loved you dearly,

    In death we love you still.

    In our hearts you hold a place,

    No one else will ever fill.

    It broke our hearts to lose you,

    But you didn't go alone.

    Part of us went with you,

    The day God took you home. 

        

          

Since I've Been Gone

    I think my lack of blog posts is enough to show the amount of fun, work, and craziness that has engulfed my life in the past months. But I also think its time I turn over a new leaf, kick-start the blog machine again.
    In the past few months I have learned so much incredible, valuable information and I may be weird to say this but I love college. (and yes the academic part) This quarter I took on the challenge of 20 units and it has turned out to be better than I expected. Although I am busy, I am surely not bored.
    During these months I have also formed some really valuable relationships. The weirdest part to me is that fact that I have met so many people who lived fairly close to me before moving to Cal Poly yet we never even knew or talked to each other.
     Cal Poly has changed many things in my life and it continues to do so. Here's to the next three years of college life!

Happy Medium

Growing up and moving out has added so many new feelings about HOME.

I have found that when I am home I cannot wait to get back to SLO or when I am in SLO for a long period of time I am ready for a visit home. I wish I could have both, in once place, at one time. They are both just such happy places.

Part of growing up and knowing my home is not Hilmar anymore is teaching me to find the happy medium between the two. I will always love my little hometown, but for now, SLO is home sweet home!

Adult

Once again, it has been way too long! College life has truly engulfed me in all its work, stress, and fun.

I have now officially been living in my new home for a month. It seems like time is just zipping by and before I know it, it will be Thanksgiving and Christmas break.

As this week is already in full swing, I have a full list of things to accomplish. One thing that has really amazed me, is how I was forced to become adult-like so fast. There is absouletly nobody in college who will tell you that you don't have enough money or you aren't going to graduate. It is all up to you!

In some ways this is wonderful, but sometimes I really do miss my wonderful mother and all her help! Welcome to the real world Lauren!!

So with your free time this week think of me as I brave a midterm, Target interview, and work on acing my wonderful college classes!

Social

The college storm has hit me. 

In less than a week I have pushed out of my comfort zone in a million in one ways. But this a wonderful thing!

Although I don't remember all their names, I have been introduced to what seems like thousands of people. Out of all these people, so many of them are so inviting! 

Living in the dorms is quite the experience so far, and I don't think there has been a quiet night yet! Everybody is on an energy high from the new move and so eager to meet new people.

I'm interested to see if the environment changes once school starts but for right now I think I may just need some sleep!

Home, Sweet Home

Well, today was the day...I finally moved away from the nest and I am now living in the beautiful San Luis Obispo. It was an exhausting day, but quite a fun experience.

Only one day in and I feel confident in calling my little dorm, HOME! There is an abundance of kind people, food, and of course a nice comfy bed.

So for tonight, I wont say much as I busy rearranging the ootles of things I brought with me! But be ready for many great SLO stories!

Go Mustangs!!

Accidental grace

Today has been eventful.

Hidden beneath all the craziness I decided its time I get back to blogging. With only a few more days until my college move this could be some of the most changing days, in well my whole life.

Not much into my day, I was interrupted my a unexpected car wreck. It ended up smaller than it very well could have been and I am thankful for my well-being at the moment.

Despite plans therefor getting changed and now becoming carless for a few days I'm finding tiny specks of grace in this.

The man who accidentally hit me was so kind, remorseful, and truly sincere. It was also a nice surprise to learn he was a fellow Hilmarian despite being half an hour away from my home. This is why it is always said, "what a small world"!

I can rest easy tonight knowing there are always nice people somewhere in the world.

Cal Poly, The 2nd Happiest Place on Earth

For the past two days I have been lucky enough to escape the heat of the valley and take a "vacation" to my future home, San Luis Obispo. With one more day left here I am beginning to frown upon the thought of leaving.

A year ago I never would have even considered living here, I frowned upon the fact that so many Hilmarians migrated here and just wanted to get as far away as possible. I am now so so thankful that God led me magically here and feel a little guilty for thinking anything negative of such a welcoming school (and town).

I now have faith that my transition into adult, college life will become slightly easier knowing I am in such a happy environment. Not only am I blessed to have found a happy place in my life right now, I am blessed to have my family's love and support also guiding me on the new journey. I am sure this will not be my only Cal Poly post where I profess my love of the college...so for you readers who choose to become a little slice of my journey too, thank you for your wonderful support ears!

GO MUSTANGS!

Thankful relationships

Sometimes to be truly thankful for what you have (not materially, but emotionally) it has to slowly, or quickly disappear. I have began to notice this little by little.

Looking back at my high school career I can say that there were several relationships that went through their rough patches. What I am beginning to notice now is that as soon as I became too self centered or unappreciative of what that friend did for me the relationship started to dwindle. Why didn't I notice this before?!

Whether it be a boy or girl I am truly going to work on cherishing each moment I get to spend with a friend. They are each in my life for a bigger purpose and unless I become aware of their presence it will soon be robbed.

I'm glad this summer has been so full of learning. I am so thankful that I have wonderful friends who are helping me learn so many things without even knowing it. Thank you!!

Little Landon

Today I am not only thankful but impressed by my little brother. I didn't see him much today but I was thankful when the day ended with his hilarious dinner entertainment.

The reality of how much I'll miss him with my move sets in everyday.

Now I don't meant to be completely depressing so I'll switch notes and give you a glimpse of Landon's shinning personality.

Almost daily, at mealtimes he chooses to entertain the family with 11 year old stand-up comedy. He does every pitch and tone of laughter known to man. For some reason, I have never been able to mature out of my giggly stage when he comes around. There is NEVER a quiet moment with Landon in the house.

Despite all the harassing and badgering I have (and Jordan too) done, I will miss every ounce of noise and movement from this spunky little guy.

Thanks Landon for keeping me on my toes with your vivacious, character-like personality. Love ya!

Blog about it

Tonight I find myself in agitation over petty things. So when all else fails, I guess I'll blog about it.

I knew graduation would bring about major changes for my peers and I but a lot has shocked me in a short amount of time. I thought the changes would slowly ease in and come over large amounts of time...I was wrong.

For some reason, I seem to find people changing drastically. A few people have gained this overwhelming sense of "I don't care anymore" or as the younger, more embarrassing generation chooses to call it "YOLO". I believe there are many things we should take lightly and not stress about, but not caring about people's feelings because you only live once can be extreme to a certain point.

To those out there thinking it all doesn't matter anymore, remind me when you learn the hard way how it now matters to you.

Thank you blog for letting me become Dr. Phil for the night!

Summer of 2012

With only the first few days of summer under my belt, I'm already so impressed.

I came into this summer thinking id be bored and anxious for college but I have been proved wrong.

Once again, the littlest things in life never seize to amaze me. Just a few offers and time to hang out with friends. Beautiful days in the sun with my family and endless graduations parties have been soo fun.

I am positive it's only going to get better and I thank God for the endless blessings he continues to send my way. Here's to an amazing summer!

Half blood

Tonight I was lucky enough to attend the Turlock Pentecost Associated Bullfights. I had nothing but a great night!

What I find amazing is my love and interest in Portuguese events. My m(who is only half Portuguese) is not fond of bullfights at all and my dads opinions are about the same.

As for me, I love them! I just don't know where it came from.

Even though I'm not 100% Portuguese, I absolutely, 100% love everything about the culture.

Thank you to meus amigos portugueses for making tonight a blast!

Wound tight

As the last days of my high school career are taking place, I have begun to notice the anxiety and tension so many people around be have built up.

My classmates are running ragged trying to balance homework, upcoming finals, and the bzillion senior actives now happening.

At home, my mom is letting the approaching changes stress her out and even make her calm demeanor waver.

What I have noticed as a common thread in all parties is the emotions of everyone becoming so unpredictable. I guess these types of changes bring about the dark sides in everyone.

Although not everyone is negatively reacting, I do feel a majority of peers have let the stress get to them.

For the people feeling wound tight around me, remember these words.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6

Near Death

I was fortunate enough to take part in the "Every 15 Minutes" program at my school yesterday and today.

For anyone who doesn't know about the program it visits high schools to teach students what driving under the influence can do to impact your life and others. Several kids including myself were chosen to be "dead" for 24 hours leaving friends and family to feel the loss.

During the program I was told that 1 in 3 is or will be affected by someone driving under the influence in some way. I didn't think this could be a real statistic, especially for kids at my young age.

I was proven wrong.

When talking with the other victims (who are fellow high school students) I began to notice that so many people I see everyday have had traumatic experiences with their immediate family and alcohol.

I have had my own share of people abusing alcohol in my family, but I have to remember there is always someone hurting worse than me out there.

Think of the people you see daily, thy may be at school, work, or church. A few of those people have been hurt somehow by a lack of judgement begin the wheel.

I will definitely strive to not be a case of disaster behind the wheel. More importantly, I'd like to be able to help people who deal with this pain. Hopefully I can find my position in this someday.

For more information on this amazing program please visit:

http://www.every15minutes.com/enter

Week of Mother-Day 7, Truly blessed

It takes everyone a different amount of time to find true happiness and peace with themselves. I'm happy to say I believe I have come to that point.

Today I took notice to how special and amazing my family (most importantly my mother) is.

No matter what the circumstances or status of my life is, I find it calming to know she is always there as her same old smiley self.

She has guided me through every step in life and I'm excited to share many more happy memories with her. (some not so happy too)

Be thankful for your mom today and everyday, I'm sure she had some part in getting you to where you are right now!

Week of Mom-Day 6, Elementary

I'm going to keep it simple tonight and do a very elementary sort of thing. (my mom really will appreciate this)

L- Loving
Y- Young at heart
N- Never underestimates
E- Early (NOT lol)
T- Teaching all the time, at school or at home
T- Thinks of others
E- Everybody treated equally

Happy 6th day of Mother's Day mom!

Week of Mother-Day 5, Teacher, teacher

To much of my dismay, I went to open house at my mom's school today. Even though I was reluctant to go, I learned and saw a lot this evening.

As soon as my mom got on campus it was as if a celebrity arrived. Not only the kids, but the parents seem so delighted to see her.

I don't mean to brag, but I feel really lucky to have such a cool mom. She is blessing to so many children at the school and makes a difference that lasts forever.

Hopefully someday I will be half as memorable as her in her everyday work!